People Reveal The Stupidest Questions Customers Have Ever Asked Them

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Customer service can be a real struggle.

I’ve worked all kinds of jobs, and anyone who has to interact with the general public knows that there are good days and bad days. Customer service workers really do want to be helpful and are pretty fantastic at turning negatives into positives on a daily basis.

But every once in a while, a customer has a question that is truly unanswerable. User PrinceETheTruth posed the question to Reddit by asking, “What is the dumbest question a customer has ever asked you?” More than 27,000 comments later, I’ve managed to pick my 21 favorites. Here’s what these people had to say about their weirdest work interactions. Misery loves company, friends.

1. I’m a dog groomer, not a tailor: “His hair is too short, can you just let the sides out a bit?”

2. Worked on a Christmas tree farm over winter break in college. One time I had a lady ask me, “So, what are these trees made out of?”

3. Spoke to the tour guide at the lodge I stay at (wild game lodge) and he said he had been asked, “Do giraffes hunt in packs?”

4. A customer wanted something for her cat. “Do you have that thing that does that thing?” No. Can you describe it? “Well, it’s for cats, and cats like it, and they get on it, and does the thing.” K. What thing? “You know, cat things.”

5. “This is the bike shop, right?” Yes. “Do you guys sell bikes or fix them?” Both. “If I brought my canoe in could you fix it?” Is canoe the name of your bike or is it a boat? “It’s just a canoe for the lake. Do you guys fix them?” What? No, we’re a bike shop. “Oh.”

6. I work at a hotel, and a client walks in: “If I book a room, does it include the bed?”

7. I went to dinner once at a Chinese restaurant in Missouri and a woman at the table next to ours yelled at the waiter, “Where is the other sauce? We are supposed to get sweet and sour sauce and we only got one sauce!”

(via Reddit / DeniseDeNephew)

8. A lady came into the store and asked us if we sold “adult toys.” This was Toys “R” Us.

9. I work in a liquor store whose inventory is 80 percent wine. You literally have to walk past aisles of wine to get to the hard liquor near the back. I was in the Scotch aisle in the back of the store when a customer approaches me, looks me me dead in the eyes, and asks, “Hey, where do you keep the wine at?”

10. CPA here. I had a client and his very cute new wife come in to drop off their tax returns. He asked, “Can I claim my wife as a dependent?” I started to reply “No, but…” He blurts out, “What good is being married if you can’t get a tax deduction for your wife?” I stayed very quiet while mentally listing the reasons. She was less than happy.

11. Working at Starbucks, patron is a pleasant mid-thirties businessman, has ordered two beverages and is waiting for them patiently. I finish up, hand him his hot chocolate and iced tea, and then he asks me which is which.

12. I used to work as a chemical manufacturer, and one of our products was a urea formaldehyde resin-based glue. Someone asked if we made edible versions of it.

13. “Do you sell real flowers here?” I work as a florist.

14. “I’ve been with Sprint for almost ten years, why do I still have to pay for a phone?”

15. “Thank you for calling the Highland Best Buy, how can I help you?” “Yeah, can I have the electronics department?”

16. I had some guy ask me if he could return a tub of “I Can’t Believe it’s Not Butter.” I said yes, and asked him why he wanted to return it and he said, “‘Cause it says butter right on the package, but it ain’t butter!”

17. When you get hired at Disneyland, other Cast Members warn you that people will ask you, “When is the 3 o’clock parade?” You assume they are joking and exaggerating, but then it actually happens, and you have to tell the guest that it is at 3 o’clock without a trace of sarcasm or exasperation.

18. Ran a lawn mowing service. New customer asks about the process. “Do you come to my house to mow it?”

19. “Are these donuts sugar free?”

20. I fly private jets. Once we were flying east early in the morning so the sun was directly in our eyes. A passenger was sitting directly behind us on the jump seat. He leaned forward and asked, “Is there any way we can just climb and get above the sun?”

21. “Can you photoshop some pictures for me?” “Sir, this is a bookstore.”

Stay sane, all you customer service professionals! We know what you have to endure every day.

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